What is the difference between queer and questioning

Queer has many different facets. Some use it to encompass all non-heterosexual, non-cisgender identities. Certainly a wide variety of non-heterosexual, non-cisgender folks are queer. But though queer might cover some part of that spectrum, it is not limited to it. I am not gay nor lesbian nor bisexual nor transgender. I am not anything other than just queer. Like plenty of the names marginalized people call themselves, queer has a fraught history of reclamation, many controversial political implications, and a universalizing aspect that is too contradictory for some.

Yet, even here at Everyday Feminism, we sometimes use gay and queer interchangeably. Not to set the two in opposition or even to say they cannot sometimes overlap, here is why I think distinguishing the two might help people who are still exploring their gender and sexuality.

It was turned into a pejorative to describe those with non-heterosexual desires and behaviors about a century ago. I understand that. Queer theorists, influenced in part by the work of French philosopher Michel Foucault , usually deal with sexuality not removed from gender but simultaneously, and questioned them both. Many push back against the essentialist idea that sex and gender are different and question the limitations inherent in a binary gendered perspective.

What is gender? What is sexuality? Can we ever truly know? As a Black person in America, my experience with gender and sexuality is going to be vastly different than a similarly situated white person. I find myself in non-white, non-male, and non-cisgender affirming gay spaces often, and they are lovely.

But queer spaces also provide me with something that is vitally different. Not all men who engage in same-gender sexual behavior identify as gay, and as such this label should be used with caution. Sexual orientation varies and is not dependent on gender identity. QUEER: a multi-faceted word that is used in different ways and means different things to different people.

S ome within the community, however, may feel the word has been hatefully used against them for too long and are reluctant to embrace it. INTERSEX: An umbrella term that describes people born with any of 30 different variations in sex characteristics including chromosomes, gonads, sex hormones, or genitals.

There does not seem to be unanimity within the intersex community nor within the asexual community, about wanting to be included in or directly linked to the community that identifies as LGBTQ. To that end, the term "queer"--whether on its own or as part of another term such as "genderqueer"--should only be used to refer to someone who self-identifies that way. Yes, sign me up. Skip to main content. October 9,